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mother’s day wishes

* If evolution really works, how come Mothers only have two hands ?
* Personally, I think today’s kids ought to do something really special for their Mothers on Mother’s Day — like move out!
* Hey guys — looking for a great gift for your Mother-in- Law on Mother’s Day ? Why not send her back her daughter?(i’m gonna do this myself!)
* A single Mom was asked by a friend what her son was taking in college. With a sigh she replied, “Everything I have.”
* Fathers — take heart, your day is coming, and you can be sure of getting at least one thing — the bills from Mother’s Day. (OMFG!)

“A fanatic is one who can’t change his mind and won’t change the subject.”– Winston Churchill

* Most Mothers are always amazed when their sons daughters marry a person with much lower mental capacity, ambition and moral standards, yet still manage to have utterly brilliant children.
* Mothers come in all shapes and sizes. For example, an Italian Mother might chastise her offspring for not eating by saying, “Eat your dinner, or I’ll kill you.” A Jewish Mother on the other hand would say, “Eat your dinner, or I’ll kill myself.”
* A daughter broke-up with her boyfriend. She asked her Mother’s advice about returning the gifts he’d given her. Without a pause, her Mother replied, “Send back the stuffed animals and letters, but
keep the jewelry for sentimental reasons.”

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