watchers & fuck Yahoo messenger

I’ve been on suicide watch several times but I’ve never been watched so closely and had the obligation to explain why i did every single thing.
it’s like asking you to explain why you went to the bathroom or why you picked your nose or why you were ogling at the hot girl on the other side of the room!
so all today, the boy and the girl been watching me and complaining about why i didn’t wanna stop acting like assholes, now i wonder “do i want it intentionally”?
till now i was sure Meg was the most annoying creature that insists on going out when i feel so down, my wrong! J is 200 times worse than her.
so i had to be this good boy who listens to whatever others say all day, I’m poisoned now!
and tomorrow i have to start my new job;to be honest I’m hell nervous, i hate meeting new people and working in new places but i can’t stay in the same place with the same people for long.
ironically my life is a real irony.
so me and MY new family went out to a random restaurant & i love J for being the one who pays, that’s awesome and i bet you’re hell jealous, ain’t yo?!
but the headache is still killing me and i can swear to all the assholes on the earth I’m still sober.
congrats to me; the 10th day is almost finished!
to be honest I’m not feeling any better, i feel sick and i can’t sleep or may be i don’t wanna sleep and the most horrible thing is i can’t surf the net tonight cos i have nowhere to go. i either have to wake the girls up in the middle of the night or drive the boy crazy cos he can’t sleep with the lights on. so I’d better sit quietly on the bed and do nothing!
it’s so ridiculous that i cant think of anything and i cant remember words to make a sentence!
may be it’s because I’ve been playing “bookworm adventures” and it’s a crap game like its name but i spent more than 2 hours finishing the first book, now I’m on the 2nd book but words are eating my brain and i can’t think of words with more than 3 letters and unfortunately many of the monsters are immune to 3 letter words so WTF!
******
and not only i hate MSN messenger and it’s a long time since the last time i logged in (more than a year) the fcuking pretty new YM shit my laptop umpteenth time that after restarting 4 times i was so eager to open the window and throw it out. thanks to my awake conscience, i remembered i cant afford a new one so simply uninstalled the fcuking program.
shiitttt, my watchers have sensed my absence and now they’re calling me.i could stare for 2-3 more hours and add a few lines but alas i have to go!
hhmm is it a bad idea to ask J to sleep on the same bed with Meg so i can surf the net all night?!? wink wink