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not in the mood of typing but……………… 

“Six Foot Cockroach”

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A man was sitting at home one evening, when the doorbell rang. When he answered the door, a 6 foot tall cockroach was standing there. The cockroach immediately punched him between the eyes and scampered off.
The next evening, the man was sitting at home when the doorbell rang again. When he answered the door, the cockroach was there again. This time, it punched him, kicked him and karate chopped him before running away.
The third evening, the man was sitting at home when the doorbell rang. When he answered the door, the cockroach was there yet again. It leapt at him and stabbed him several times before running off. The gravely injured man managed to crawl to the telephone and summoned an ambulance.
He was rushed to intensive care, where they saved his life.
The next morning, the doctor was doing his rounds. He asked the man what happened, so the man explained about the 6 foot cockroach’s attacks, culminating in the
near fatal stabbing.
The doctor thought for a moment and said, “Yes, there’s a nasty bug going around.”
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

“It’s a Flu Season”
How To Avoid It:
Eat right!
make sure you get your daily dose of fruits and veggies.
Take your vitamins and bump up your vitamin C.
Get plenty of exercise because exercise helps build your immune system.
Walk for at least an hour a day, and go for a swim.
Take the stairs instead of the elevator.
Wash your hands often. If you can’t wash them, keep a bottle of antibacterial stuff around.
Get lots of fresh air. Open doors and windows whenever possible.
Try to eliminate as much stress from your life as you can.
Get plenty of rest.
OR
Take your doctor’s approach.
Think about it……
When you go for a shot,
what do they do first?
They clean your arm with alcohol…
Why?
Because Alcohol KILLS GERMS.

So…….
I walk to the liquor store… (exercise)
I put lime in my Corona …(fruit)
Celery in my Bloody Mary… (veggies)
Drink outdoors on the bar patio…(fresh air)
Tell jokes, laugh….(eliminate stress)
Then pass out… (rest)
The way I see it… If you keep your alcohol levels up, flu germs can’t get you!
My grandmother always said, “A shot in the glass beats one in the arse!”

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2 Comments

  1. I don’t have a nasty bug, but I have a hell of a sore throat. I went to the soccer game yesterday and screamed til I’m hoarse and throat hurts like a bitch. Maybe I should try your flu remedy. naw – coffee is going to have to do it.

  2. hope get better soon so i can send you a nasty bug 🙂


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